Still alive

Sorry I’ve not been active. Haven’t had reliable tools out in the field but I’m getting there.

We’re all in this together.

Consider thanking the next veteran you see for their service not just in word but thought and deed too. You’ll both be blessed I’m sure.

Here’s an old Marching Cadence Capt. Marlborough disciplined into me, back in “Okitraz,” hell on Earth, and remember… Believe to receive that the New Year will indeed be a happy one. Grace and shalom, faithful few.

Begin forwarded message:

From: John Donner
Date: December 20, 2014 at 12:06:33 AM PST
To: dean
Subject: That Marine chant I was telling you about

So apparently this was synthesized by me at some point and I even claim to have written a few stanzas (though I could no longer tell you which). I put the stanzas I had originally attributed to my old Company Commander in [brackets].

You can keep your Army khakis, you can have your Navy blues
But I’ve another breed of man to introduce to you
He may not be pretty, he may not be clean
But he goes by the name of United States Marine

We were born on a depot, the land that God forgot
The sand is 18 inches deep, the sun is blazing hot
We hump a hundred miles a day, it keeps us lean and mean
The Germans called us Devil Dog, our real name is Marine

[And when it comes to fighting, we even up the score
We pray to God every single night that he will end all war
And if I die in battle, then leave me where I lay
Continue to fight, with all your might, we’ll meet another day]

We died on the beach at Guadacanal and we died in Vietnam
We died in the mud at Belleau Wood and we died in Lebanon
In all of our battles over a million have come and gone
To honor our fallen brothers we will keep marching on

And when I get to heaven, to Saint Peter I will tell
Another Marine reporting sir, I’ve served my time in hell
And when I look around me, I will be glad to see
One hundred thousand other Marines standing next to me

Singing Marine…..
Marine…..
Our real name is Marine
Singing Marine…..
Marine…..
Our real name is Marine

[And now that we’re in heaven, our final resting place
St. Peter’s calling cadence and you know we’re keeping pace
We thought our job was over, they said you’ve got one more
And issued us a set of wings and flew us off to war

And on his second coming, I think Jesus will be seen
With a hand full of angels and a fist full of Marines
And when you see us coming, you better jump aboard
My eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord]

Singing Marine…..
Marine…..
Our real name is Marine
Singing Marine…..
Marine…..
Our real name is Marine

LCpl JWD USMC Medically Sevranced

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Three Important Disciplines

I left my house at 1000 or so and didn’t return until 0209, so I didn’t really have much of a chance to write anything today. Just out, as I claim to be (and whether you find me true in this claim is certainly up for debate) “living the Kingdom of YHWH now.” So, as situations arose and other people needed things, I obeyed, and that chain of obedience didn’t end until just now.

That being said, if I had to write about any of the disciplines that kept me sharp out there in the field, I’d say that there were three important ones I practiced – forgiveness, reconciliation and unity.

Why, as a body, does it seem like we’re always focusing on what’s wrong with one another and seeking to correct that? If a person has a ten point argument, and 5 are good points and 5 are bad, imagine what happens when you only focus on the negative ones and say nothing about the positive ones. You’re immediately reinforcing the negative points and causing the person to become defensive about them and SEEK OUT REASONS TO CONTINUE TO BELIEVE IN THEM rather than something more edifying. If you disagree with something, IGNORE IT, and then affirm what you DO agree about. The points people receive positive feedback for are the ones they’re going to develop further, focus on, and continue to talk about (since people like them)!

All three of the disciplines are at work in the paragraph above. Anyway, I understand this is a shorter post but I feel I’ve said all that really needs to be said, and while I might be able to lay all of this out with exact scriptural addresses for you to find it in…why not apply the scriptural discipline of testing the spirits for yourself, and seeing whether what the spirit is telling you about what I am saying can be confirmed through the witness of the 4000 year testimony of the Old Testament and the 2000 year old testimony of the New Testament?

And then, how about we come into more agreement by encouraging each other, working together, building each other up, and connecting… truly becoming “The King’s Church International?”

A Christmas Miracle

This is another piece I hammered out with a keyboard. Forgive me. I’ve been so busy recently I haven’t had the free time to myself as much to sit down and write the old fashioned way. First thing’s first: I was convicted by Proverbs 23:23 and Matthew 10:8 and realized I should not at all be charging a dime to people for them to access what I have written. If however THEY feel for whatever reason that they want to contribute to my life, I am leaving the patreon up (the same way you might see a paypal link on a twitch stream or something). At some near-future date I may also convert this wordpress domain into a “legitimate” one.

Anyway. I have had a tremendous battle going on for the greater part of five years concerning being diagnosed “Bipolar Type I” according to the wisdom and ways of man (and thus being treated in that same wisdom) and contending for the truth of the spiritual realities behind that diagnosis. I won’t go super into depth about it because it’s a topic a lot of people are very passionate about, but I will say that I was healed in the same way Yeshua would go about healing anyone.

I’ve been off my meds for about 7 months. I’ve been sort of “white” lying about it, to the VA and to some other people, just to avoid any number of things I had fears and worries about – ending up in the ward again, having my benefits cut off, all of those things. I realized I couldn’t go out and do the sorts of things I wanted to do nor accurately proclaim to the world that I am living in the Kingdom of YHWH and that the truth had set me free unless I rectified this situation.

The first thing to do was to honor the contractual agreement that I had with the VA, which I signed, which required me to “take medications as proscribed by my psychiatrist.” And so to honor that I contacted my assigned nurse and left a voice mail explaining that I was having symptoms in the natural that might lead a doctor who understands the theory of Bipolar Type I to be concerned that a “manic episode” was incoming. I said if I didn’t hear back from her, I’d check myself into the ER at the VA hospital after a church service last night (12/24).

She called me back a few hours later and we verbally re-negotiated my contract (with the understanding it was never legally binding in the first place) such that my treatment plan now includes no clause about needing to be on medications. Moreover, the VA understands my position that I do not think I am “disabled” nor that I should be the recipient of benefits afforded “disabled” persons, but has decided to continue to bless me with them for the time being.

There may come a day when I am found “0% disabled” and my benefits are cut off, and I have full faith in the father to provide for me no matter where I am or what I am doing (Proverbs 3), so I do not fear that day. In a way, I kind of look forward to it.

What was your Christmas Miracle this year?

Called to Duty: Modern Spiritual Warfare

I’m breaking my own rules here a little bit and composing this on a keyboard instead with a pen and paper, but hang in there.

Warfare in the natural has changed drastically since Paul wrote about the “Armor of God/Elohim” in Ephesians. While the principles of spiritual warfare haven’t necessarily changed (spirit = eternal), re-explaining some of the metaphors and analogies that Paul uses with a “modern” update may be helpful in understanding why the supposedly “called out ones” are so woefully inept (by which I mean: show me evidence where we are walking as conquerors, in unity, against the Kingdom of Darkness and the Kingdoms of this world…not just minor personal victories but world shattering, earth changing corporate victory!) in the present “military” campaigns of the Kingdom.

As many of you know, I was trained as a Marine calibrator. While I never saw combat, nor even deployed into a combat zone (or received even a fraction of the same kind of discipline in combat arts that a bona-fide combat arms Marine would’ve received), Marines are still instilled with the basics. This is so that should they ever be called into a combat situation, those basics can readily be expounded upon in the work-up training and then capitalized during the deployment.

No matter how strong, fast, intelligent or prepared you are, when you arrive at boot camp you literally know nothing. It is not inaccurate to say that you don’t even know how to put on your own pants. Over the course of 3 months you go from not even being able to dress yourself to being able to complete close order drill in a unit of 50-80 Marines, recite your general orders by memory, understand and know how to wear and maintain all of your uniforms (garrison, dress, and service), and have been forced into a situation where other discipline is a fact of life (no soda, restricted diet, set amount of sleep and exercise per day, and other things). Additionally, you practically live and sleep with your rifle. Every Marine is a rifleman is the creed of the Marine Corps; the infantry is its lifeblood and its entire mission. One of the most important weeks in boot camp is when you spend an entire week on the rifle range – as I recall it, there were much fewer instances of Drill Instructors playing head games and there was much less emphasis on physical exercise. This is the precious week in which you commit 100% of your energy into mastering your most basic tool as a Marine, and marksman accuracy is a point of pride (one of many points of pride) in the Marine Corps. You WANT to be a Rifle Expert (and I was, graduating boot camp!) Again, this relates back to accuracy.

So let’s stop here for a second. I’m not going to flesh out all of the analogies and metaphors that Paul used, but let’s talk about the “sword of the spirit.” If the “sword of the spirit’ is now an “M16A4 Service Rifle of the Spirit,” how accurate are you with it? Are you a certified Marksman? If you cannot pass rifle qualification in boot camp, you cannot graduate and you cannot become a Marine – period. You need to get at least a certain amount of your shots “in the black,” as we say. Ideally, in the context of being a “rifleman” for the Kingdom, don’t you want to hit 100% of your shots?

Your training as a Marine doesn’t stop there. If you are going into a combat discipline you go to the School of Infantry and your entire career then becomes mastery of the art of warfare. You could even end up in specialized schools for special missions – like Force Recon, Scout Sniper, or what was once MARSOC but is now called the Raiders, I believe. Point being, as a combat arms Marine, your training never ends. (This is actually true no matter what your job is, in fact.)

But even as a Marine who is not in a combat arms job, you still go through one more month of additional combat training called “Marine Combat Training.” Here is where you really learn your own limits, as your instructors push you into forced 10-20 mile hikes with 2 hours of sleep and no food in your system. You do land navigation. You learn some of the heavier, crew served weapons. You learn how to do a combat patrol and sortie. Things like that.

Marines are also trained to use their hands as weapons. (I don’t think there is an equivalent piece of armor in Paul’s analogy.) Every Marine is qualified as a “tan belt” in the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program and every Marine is encouraged to pursue advanced belts as part of their career development – with certain “minimum belts” being expected of Marines of certain ranks and jobs.

Understanding all of this, here is the average condition of those who are supposedly in the army of the Kingdom today: they’re still in the receiving company of boot camp, going through all of the processing and immunizations and literally don’t even know what time it is and they are scared out of their wits. They also don’t even know how to put their own pants on.

Why are we surprised, then, that the Kingdom is not advancing? And why has this happened? Because the tradition of discipleship (discipline!) has been lost and the saints are not equipping each other.

1-2 Tevet 5775

1 TEVET 5775 ::: 12/23/2014 0015 PST

Too many blessings to list by practicing simple obedience for one evening. Chief among them was a “chance encounter” (divine appointment) with a fellow pilgrim on this Earth who ministered to me the Word and elucidated concepts I hadn’t thought about. I hope I was also a blessing to him. Exactly what I needed! Praise YHWH!

2 TEVET 5775 ::: 12/24/2014 0218 PST

Been engaged all day. While writing is still a priority, been walking in reconciliation regarding some past relationships. Need to handle apartment as well. Powerful prayer and worship earlier.

Concerning Accuracy and Truth; It Is Written

30 KISLEV 5775 ::: 12/22/2014 0847 PST

I find myself writing more online than in this notebook, if only because I have mentally partitioned it as something to be used only to document daily happenings; especially as they are relevant to my travels or are related to the purpose behind my travels.

That unfortunately has led to some having an incomplete picture with which to assess my spiritual or “religious” convictions and dispositions. Moreover, it is somewhat difficult in any case to ascertain the sincerity of one’s actions through one’s own words. Also, I refuse to fall into the trap of justifying myself to men. All this being understood, there are some things I’d like to clarify.

“In the natural,” as a spiritual sort might say, I was trained to be a metrologist by the United States Marine Corps; metrology being the science of measurement. It was a task primarily concerned with accuracy. Most people do not think, as they are taking a measurement, “how can I trust that the device I am using is accurate?” For everyday purposes, a high degree of accuracy isn’t that necessary. How many times have you weighed yourself on your own scale in the morning and then shrugged off the realization you’d gained or lost 5-10 pounds between the morning weigh-in and the time it took for you to arrive at your doctor’s appointment for a weigh-in in the afternoon? We tend to trust that the doctor’s scale is probably more accurate, but for most, we are not overly concerned that our own scale is not as accurate. We just begin mentally compensating (“I am the weight my scale reads plus or minus 5 to 10 pounds), and that’s that.

Such a laissez-faire appraoch doesn’t cut it for military grade electronics, aeronautics and applications. That is where metrology technicians come into play. We are trained to verify the accuracy of measurements taken by devices against known standards of measurements with higher degrees of accuracy, in an unbroken chain of standards leading directly back to the “gold” (i.e., national or international standard, generally dictated by the National Institute of Standards and Technology). If a device is found to be out of tolerance (i.e., not accurate enough), we’ve also received a crash course in electrical engineering and component level troubleshooting/repair in order to bring a device back into tolerance.

I don’t intend this as a boast, but I was considered very competent at my job. I was the honor graduate of my class, received several letters of endorsements from the top ranking Marines in my lab, and was appointed to positions of authority usually reserved for Marines of much more senior rank. I also received an individual commendation for my active duty service, which you may know was regrettably cut short. The point being, I found the concept of accuracy fascinating, having also been a lifelong lover (and, at that time, current student of) philosophy. In that context of philosophy, I had always pursued the truth (and whether there was an absolute truth), a pursuit in which accuracy is a critical component.

Why do I say all this as regards my spiritual activities? Well, after being forced into a spiritual competition/mystical experience through no desire of my own, I was left with essentially two choices: accept what (decent, compassionate) men were telling me or try to investigate and come to my own conclusions. At the time of my first ineffable experience with the eternal realm, I had essentially zero spiritual “standards” with which to evaluate my experience, let alone test the accuracy of my interpretations. Thus, it was easy to trust the conclusions of the Marine S[taff]N[on]C[ommissioned]O[fficers], warrant officers, commissioned officers, sailors, petty officers, and

18:47

That is the exact word I left off on at around 1000 PST, because [the friend I previously wrote about from college] reached out to me and needed my time. Even though I had my plans – errands, appointments, writing, prayer, study – I dropped everything to minister YHWH’s word to him in love for 6 straight hours. [Yeshua did not tell the people who needed him to “come back tomorrow” or wait on him – although I tried to do exactly this at first.] I will complete the thought left hanging and continue my thesis before, Adonai willing, writing about 1000-1847 PST. Exactly where we left off:

Naval commissioned officers who were generally motivated by shared bonds of philia love and wanted the best for my wellness as best they knew how to deliver it.

Their counsel was to completely repress and suppress all “religious delusions,” stay away from scriptures, and comply with medications. So I did exactly that for one year and had perhaps the most miserable year of my entire life. I could only cope by drinking 5-10 shots of scotch almost every night and was left often to cry alone as I fell out of touch and (seemingly) favor with my brothers – the Marines of CLR-35, 3rd Maintenance Battalion ELMACO 2009-2010. I also had to grapple with the complete destruction of my career and very identity.

As I was about to process out – and the anniversary of the date of onset for my illness (February 14 2010 being that date – the “day of love” in the Western world) approached, I decided to investigate what had happened to me and why it happened using the only tools I knew how to use – writing and deep introspection.

This caused me to relive the events and I accordingly had an even more powerful and severe mystical experience/psychotic break which landed me in a state psychiatric ward in Chicago beginning in early-mid March 2011.

Literally days prior to this, I first encountered (“by chance”) my spiritual father, Jim Teak II, among others.

After exiting the wards in Chicago and returning to San Diego, I began 3 earnest (sometimes more earnest, sometimes less earnest) years of studying and practically applying the Word. I had three more inpatient stays from June 2011-August 2012. I continually lost my zeal, joy, and quality of life as my medication regiment shifted and intensified. I bloated to 280 pounds (having been 180 pounds on active duty and rail thin my entire life prior).

There are pages and pages of details to write concerning all of this. The important part is that I was building my own spiritual “standard” by which not only could I verify the accuracy of my own experiences and interpretations, but also could verify the accuracy of other people’s words and deeds according to that standard.

My standard is, very simply, the written word of YHWH. When Yeshua was tempted after 40 days of of fasting in the desert by the enemy, He rebuked the enemy each time by simply stating “IT IS WRITTEN,” and then prophesying the Word of YHWH. Yeshua was literally the LIVING, BREATHING WORD OF YHWH MADE FLESH (John 1), yet He chose to rebuke, resist, and put to his heel Satan in this specific manner. He did this so that we who are not (yet) the Word made flesh could understand how to do the same – by using the written, established, tried, tested and found true WORD of YHWH. Which, I would remind you, was read by Yeshua in Hebrew and most certainly spoken by Yeshua in that or any other situation in Hebrew – NOT in King James English.

Selah.

Honestly, selah on that for a long time. It is so imperative to selah on that that I do not yet need to write and share about what happened to my friend and myself between 1000-1847 PST today.

Not my words, but His WORD. Amen.

28 Kislev 5775

1500 PST

Forgot to honor the Sabbath, which is another habit I need to revive.

Spent some time in the Word, but was also engaged in some fruitful correspondences. Read some of my old pieces from In Mala Fide because I was interested in the comments (a lot of the comments on many – maybe all – my Spearhead posts are now gone). I had made a greater impact than I gave myself credit for, and also followed the rabbit hole down through someone who expressed interest in my writing just as I was ceasing from it. [Ed note: I have uploaded the four pieces that I wrote which were published on In Mala Fide, comments more or less intact, for those seeking more context to this post. Just check out this category to see them.]

A lot of truths [my Pastor] teaches, I had known (if not in whole at least in part) before even meeting him. I liken the situation almost to Romans 2:14-16, though in truth I had learned, internalized, and never fully abandoned some scriptural principles beginning from a young age. Where I missed the mark was in some of the conclusions I drew, as well as properly identifying, discerning and dividing the truth from sweet sounding deceptions [Hebrews 4:12] (which I have written more in depth about previously).

This man that I found has – bless his heart! – chosen to stay true to the narrow path. He was reaching out to me just as he began his own journey, to choose whether ot hold fast to the faith and principles he had grown up with or follow down the seductive paths of nihilism and hedonism that the red pill manosphere offers young, intelligent, lonely but otherwise extremely capable and talented men. Given the choice between the promise of ridicule and loneliness for virtue’s sake or the offer of, essentially, on-demand sex through mastery of the arts of seduction, he made the choice few indeed would make. From what I have read of him, he certainly deserves the following he has attracted and his commitment to physical as well as mental and spiritual discipline puts me to shame.

I pray earnest that, on his path to truth, the temptations of the flesh would not stumble him as they have me. I also pray he can receive revelation of YHWH’s names and attributes, to be blessed by the increased intimiacy such precious knowledge and wisdom allows I pray too that his understanding of the essential Jewish qualities of the savior and messiah I know he wishes to serve with all his heart, mind, soul and strength would grow and increase in this season we are entering. If I am to be the one to shout YHWH’s name in the wilderness (of the manosphere remnant) in accordance with the prophecy of Isaiah 40:3-8, then I pray for repentance (to change my thinking according to the seed of truth you have sown in me that I might bear fruit through my actions) so I may one day have the same boldness and authority as the man prophesied to carry out that task in the scriptures. And if I am the natural voice that this man I am praying for is to hear in order for his spiritual ears to receive the deposit of the Ruach Qodesh – the very breath of Elohim, of YHWH, which gave life to the adamah (dust of the Earth) to the first adam (man, Adam) – then Amen and Selah! Not my Words but yours, Adonai – nor my glory but instead yours. I know in my spirit you have called him to great responsibility and he will have a huge impact on the King’s Harvest. Amen!

In other developments, I launched my Patreon, and transcribed all that I have written so far. I have been able to resist temptation and tame my flesh for at least a few days. Perhaps another Confession of Sins is in order should I succumb?

Undoubtedly some will read what I have been writing, having come from my Facebook link to this project and think, “Well, he is headed for straight for the loony bin again.” This is because what people have come to expect from mainstream Christianity is, in fact, insane! Prove to me in the scriptures that we should have blind faith! Prove to me in the scriptures that we should erase all of El Elyon’s names (and thus attributes) and only know Him by two titles! Prove to me that the power of YHWH’s son’s name is in the Greek rendering “Jesus” and not in the Hebrew “Yeshua” or “Yohoshua” he was known by! When you pray in the name of Jesus – WHO ARE YOU PRAYING TO? I am not likely to respond to the name of Juan* – nor am I likely to appreciate you insisting upon calling me that when I’ve told you my name – simply because it is more comfortable for you! Why do we think it is any different for YHWH, Yeshua or the Ruach Qodesh?

*Special exception exists for the men and one lady of the 2009-2010 Okinawa Calibrations platoon, from whom Juan is in fact a high term of endearment.

2200 PST

Lots to write about. Spent 4 hours with [a friend I met in a college course locally]. First few hours were great, but (not to imply things ended unwell) towards the end we hit a wall that we always do.

At first he was pleased to just hear me share about the reasons why I feel compelled to do what I will be doing, but then he began to ask perfectly fair and reasonable questions of me. I tried to make it clear that neither I, nor truly the words of ANY man, would be able to satisfy the burden of evidence he desires – the exact same evidence I wish to also see for myself! Moreover, because I ONLY have my human intellect and perhaps some outward fruits of the Ruach Qodesh (Galatians 5:22-23), but haven’t completely conquered the sins of the flesh (Galatians 5:19-21), I haven’t even the most fundamental of the MANIFESTATIONS of the Ruach (1 Corinthians 12-14). And not having those, if my friend’s spiritual ears could not hear YHWH’s voice through my natural voice, then because I have no power of the Ruach Qodesh to substantiate my arguments then they would all just be vain persuasions of man (1 Corinthians 2).

When I am called to minister in the role of an evangelist, I am acutely concerned and compassionate towards the eternal mindset and stature of the person (and spiirt!) to whom I am ministering. However, I also realize it is not my role to convict, bring about repentance or conversion. Those are all offices of the Ruach Qodesh and up to the free will choice of the person to whom I am conversing with. (Call me false or accuse me of watering down the wrath of YHWH, but please do so in the scriptures so that I can respond in kind.) My only responsibility in that moment is to ensure that the person I am speaking with can no longer claim ignorance about the free will decision that is their gift from Elohim to make, nor the potential eternal consequences of it.

My friend had difficulty following the logic of why an agnostic doesn’t get a free “out” when it comes to the existence of a creator, despite what some agnostics may think (including myself when I was an agnostic with this belief). Logically, either an ultimate creator – the true first cause, all of that – either exists, or does not exist. Deists have staked their wages on the bet that said creator does exist, while atheists have cast their lots on the side that says a creator does not exist. Agnostics say that they do not have enough evidence to arrive at a conclusion. However, EVERYONE must play the game simply by living life. If the atheists are right then everybody’s dead and that’s the end. If the deists are right then the creator decides your fate according to how you lived your life – little hope for atheists in most cases (EXCEPT ironically in the case of Yeshua and YHWH as revealed in the scriptures), and if agnostics refuse to make a decision regarding diety it is unlikely they would have lived in such a way as to sufficiently pleased most deities (though, again, even in these dire circumstances there is still hope in Yeshua).

You can’t escape the logical necessity of the question by refusing to commit to one position or the other. Everyone is forced to take the gamble by simply living. If you want to knowingly roll the dice and “let come what may” – and the idea that 80-120 years of live could have eternal ramifications for you doesn’t bother you – then more power to you! So long as you understand the gamble we all must take – and what is at stake – I have done my due diligence. Everyone peddling a religion and a church will tell you they have the one true way. While I, too, believe that there is only one true way – the Messiah, Yeshua, who sits on the Great White Throne at the end of days to render judgment and rewards to each and every one as according their deeds and place in the Book of Life or Lamb’s Book of Life – I am not going to insult your intelligence by pretending my human intellect and whatever gift of persuasive argument I may possess will be able to convince you of such a monumental truth proposition. Again, only the Ruach Qodesh, the very breath of YHWH and “Spirit of Truth” sent to verify and testify of Yeshua can do such a thing.

Earlier in the conversation, before the doubting and the wall we hit – we were at a restaurant and I was blessed to learn our waitress was blessed to have heard our conversation. My friend misunderstood her enthusiasm as attraction towards me, when really it was just her spirit responding to the words of life contained in the scriptures that I was speaking to my friend. And praise Elohim (I was fortunate to be able to teach her some of what Elohim means!) that she did have ears to hear, as the daughter of a pastor! I gave her one of [my Pastor]’s cards, as I don’t yet have my own, and would be blessed whether she chose to press in or whether we don’t hear from her again.

My friend remained distracted by her, however, insisting that I should ask her out several times. There was no denying her attractiveness! But it wasn’t my flesh she was responding to, certainly – I have a jacked up haircut, no fashion sense, bad teeth, broken smile, unkempt beard and I’m about fifty pounds overweight. No, it was the Ruach Qodesh speaking to her that ignited her!

I tried to explain how I could understand my friend’s response, because of the absolutely toxic and vile effect pornography has had on how I’ve related to women, but my friend views pornography as natural and healthy so there’s no sense pushing the subject.

Lastly… MGySgt W shared some words that brought about tears for the first time in a long time. It is difficult to express the daily guilt I feel over the circumstances of my early exit from active duty. I feel I dishonored the brotherhood and the memory of my grandfather, Lieutenant Colonel William Lee Donner, who fought on the isle of Iwo Jima and in the Korean War. To be affirmed as an “outstanding Marine” by anyone of senior rank is an honor, but particularly so by this Marine who not only had the acumen to rise to the top of one of the most technically demanding jobs in the Corps, but who also possessed the Honor, Courage and Commitment to serve in a combat tour outside of his MOS – to literally bestow the greatest love, according to Yeshua: to lay down his life for his friends… To be so esteemed by such a  man means very much indeed. So if you are reading this, too, Master Gunnery Sergeant, thank you.

Now, to sort clothes.